flint

Another beautifully snow blown day~

While very interesting and I'm left really just trusting God for so much wisdom ~ I think he's testing me right now, or whether he's testing me or just the world is testing me. I want to respond like Isaiah did,

Isaiah 50:7 (NIV)

Because the Sovereign LORD helps me, 

I will not be disgraced. Therefore have

 I set my face like flint, 

 and I know I will not be put to shame.

Sometimes it doesn't work out as planned dreamed wished or hoped! I'm realizing its okay. A fairlytale left hidden in my heart, where my maker can come find me submitted~ Willing and ready~ To walk with him anywhere~ 

I pray, if he was going to knock on my door, i would be ready to answer my heavenly Father right away~

your r my shield:)

 will bless the Lord forever
I will trust Him at all times
Made me glad Lyrics from Hillsong

really speaking to me tonight:) and praying people would find him in the midst of trials ~

He has delivered me from all fear
He has set my feet upon a rock
I will not be moved 
And I'll say of the Lord

You are my shield, my strength
My portion, deliverer
My shelter, strong tower
My very present help in time of need

Whom have I in heaven but You
There's none I desire beside You
You have made me glad
And I'll say of the Lord

You are my shield, my strength
My portion, deliverer
My shelter, strong tower
My very present help in time of need

no i had lucky charms

If i didn't put God first in my life;

Many things would be sooo radically different for me!( including probally being married and living in indai~lol)

I constantly need to remember that God is on my side.

When it doesn't seem like it should and becomes tuff, i have to rememeber his promises to me~

He won't ever leave or forsake me.

I have obeyed him with huge choices in my life, which took a great amount of faith!

while presently i'm wrestling with small choices, which may take more faith then i 've imagine~

 Great steps take great faith

Great faith requires great steps. So whether your steps are big or small it still requires your whole being to submit to God and trust in him~meaning great faith~

No step is less then the other, because each one leads to the greater cause~

So all im hoping to say, is living a life of faith requires a dependancy on Christ in everything. Why Do  things on your own anyways right?

Okay so what if u Give it to Christ, and you still feel nothing is working, i think He then invites us to partner with his body, which is the church to accomplish the task~!

who's Jesus?;)

Part of  a song from, 'Hillsong'

You stood before creation- eternity in your hands, you spoke the earth into motion, my soul now to stand.

You stood before my failures, carried the cross for my shame, my sin weighed upon your shoulders, my soul now to stand

So what could i say? What could I do?

But offer this heart oh, God completey to You!...

-So I'll stand with arms high and heart abandon, in awe of the one who gave it all, i'll stand my soul Lord to you surrendered all all i am is Yours!

Gosh this is a great song.. Speaking to me so much how GOd choose to stand for us first:)

He choose to accept me despite my failures depsite everything that doens't honor him. He stood, because He loved me!

 I realize How much it must of hurt him to stand to give his life for me. Sometimes i forget or maybe just don't think about how real this is~ Sometimes its a memory of the verses or the reflection of the cross. But I think it should be a daily remembrance thing in my life. TO remember He standed for me, He standed for  my famliy, He stood for the surrounding countries and people all over the world!

Gosh He only needed to do it once, and now we all are free! Because of Jesus's obediance to the Father, we all now lay before a open door to heaven, an open door to talk and hand out with God, here while we chill on earth. hah

I just love that He stood first~

Sometimes i feel like i'm the only one standing for certain things or burdens layed on my heart. BUt really He stood before me, that he is still standing for his will to be done on earth!

When i feel like i can't stand or when it gets tuff, i can dwell on Jesus, how he was able to stand despite difficulty because the Spirit of God was upon him! And also upon me:)

I love this. I admire this! I want to my life to testify to this standing! 

I learned today alot, mainly how i'm a people person. I work best with people, I really would like to be part of a team in everything that i do.  Not sure why this is a red light for me today, but i guess i always liked being alone, and never had a problem with it. I am introverted, but i think i work best boucing off ideas of other people. I learn, more.hmm i'm a dork i know:)

haha, ok.. but for joke of the day.... or should i say.. my joke.lol

So i'm in this new bible study group focused on Romans~

Today was the first day, an there were quite a big size of a group. Any how a horrible Hope moment came.. Yes.. i know i had something obnoxiously funny to say, an only i was going to get it!.. i was totally going to hold it back.. but i couldn't

There was this super serious moment an then they asked for questions, let me remind u these are all older people then me..;) and i'm like in the back of the group sorta hidden, and i'm like who is Christ!

            I'm glad one man laughed;)My pastor the teacher, was so low key, well Jesus .. Jesus Christ..He totally was clueless that it was me and that I wasn't serious!

Gosh if only my freind was there who was from hawaii in my bible shool.  He would say crazy random things like that, to well really serious professors who came an taught!!!!

Prettty sure he got kicked out, of the school? or something..?But I think it was because he would randomly throw chairs off the belcony at night by the dorms..hm

Ok so, i'm on my way... forward and really appeciate the small things in life that make such a difference!

JOY

I want the JOY of the Lord to lift me!

I want the JOY of the Lord to change me!

I want the JOY of the Lord in my life!

~ I need his joy to restore everything that was taken from me! I need Gods joy to be my strength:)I love that His joy has the capability to do some mighty good damage~

I consider my self a pretty joyful person:) But now I want more of GOd's joy...A joy to hold me when it seems foggy, a joy to help me to remain faithful when hardtimes come. His Joy has to be my foundation:) with out joy........how could we hope....With out the joy the pain will seem endless~@!

..........I think of haiti, an the horrible disaster.... How do you cope in such sadness and pain!

I believe GOd is able to bring joy, not to hide the pain but to allow us to know this is a moment and things will get better~! I can't imagine what the people are going through over there, but i do pray they wouldn't lose heart and would find strength in God. And wouldn't lose sight of the sunshine, and GOds love! They would be able to hope dream and have faith of a new beginning!With new promises. With Jesus in the center~

I pray for miricles~ I pray for Jesus to come and raise the dead! I pray that nothing would seperate others from finding shelter in God in this terrible time! I pray oh Jesus, please do a miricle or millions:) thanks u love them an u love me~ Pour it over us~! save + heal and release life!

feeling like tye die....hmm

well its a long day

I think God did some awesome things for sure, especially at work today:)

God to witness to a lady who came in really depressed, and i shared how God has purpose in her life. We talked for awhile an she let me pray for her:) It was really neat.

Oh and people in town are complaining that there is no buisness.. true very slow,.. I asked GOd what was a good solution:)... He shared with me how there was no real honor is this town. Alot of people are out for themselves, an forget about honoring others:(

So He told me to put up a sale sign! To honor custormers.. Not so much just for buisness but, to show honor!!!!!!!!

This meant alot to me, as i'm on a journey of learning about how to honor God. And too take this step today, i hope it touched his heart, and maybe others too. My mom thought i was a nut!~ but then realized i was clever. bc i got out valentines decorations and sorta wne all out..lol..But over all i belive in the times of hardship  and trial. GOd is the only one we can run to. I know he is the one who can help us in distress and fear. I pray GOd will release buisness in northern michigan but more over, release humility and honor!~

 a high lite of the night... is well i have a plate of stuff to get done an do an to think an decide about.

While todays i kept getting distracked so easily . I hate this, i'm realizing now the reason for it is because i guess working to me is lonely. Its like driving for perfection 24/7, you want to give your best, but at the end of the day, i still have loads to do:) And no one to say hey good job~

Sorta reality in alot of peoples life i think:)

Anyhow, i decided to quickly go for a milk run, because i drank the last cup an theres a 15 year old in the house who probally want cereal in the morning:) anyways, i was bummed to take a break bc i felt like i didn't get what i wanted done today. :(

It was rediculous this shame, like i was a failure~ 

But i heard Gods voice in all these thoughts and it was remarklable He intervened:)

He pointed straight at my heart~ He said this is what counts babe! Of all the people doing their own things right now, you are bummed because you think you failed at the work you wanted to finish today, SO it would give me more glory tomorrow ~!

God spoke something i can't ever forget tonight, that "Its not about how you might think you have failed to your own standard or to the worlds, but how you are honoring me with your life:) There will be set backs and failures, but the way you approach them is what matters."

Its true, an its a great overall picture that of course GOd sees...

What i think as procrastinating an distractions~ is not who I am or what I'm about= but a wall which tries to block me from finishing the great call. 

It is not my failing to serve God but me failing to believe God is right beside me in my everything!...

I know things are easier with more people, and it will be once I get the main things down for this conferance- but to live every moment with the faith that God is my right hand friend and buddy is my new challenge.

He's not just there when i ask or feel his presence, but  The Holy Spirit dwells in me!

This is great and encourages me to move forward~

No more putting clothing on dogs, or calling people for a second then having some pop!

I know these are fun an relaxing things but when they distract me from allowing God to speak to my heart, they become a idol in which is there bc of fear....

hm maybe go deeper on this fear another time.. its late and i have to sub tomorrow~ for crazy little ones:)

spice

Sometimes i think what doesn't make sence to us and may even be challenging, maybe making a huge differences in the lives around us.

I can't guarentee this is true, but i have one witness so far tonight~

I'm glad even in trails, the Lord uses me in quite ironic ways~:)

Even more... taking advantage of trials... into GOd moving moments... is pretty awesome~!

Its looking at the opportnity's around the dull moments an saying whats next Lord~

Its seems like theres so much we think we know, but really infact, we are clueless in how we can really be a blessing to others~ Thats why we really need to be open to listening to HolySpirit~

the end

oh mcdonalds...

So i'm not a huge mc donalds fan 24/7.. but once an while after the prayer house on tuesday its the quickest chicken sandwitch around....

lol 

okay but seriouly a piece of chicken a pickle on two pieces of bread it pretty shabby....

So much for that picture. i was totally going tor return it, but was to tired an hungry~

Not sure why i'm blogging this.. bc God totally rocked me tonight and i don't mean to complain... but seriosly please just put at least some ketchup on it for me:)

lol...

I miss.... my nephew today;) hope to c him tomoorow` an get one million things done...ger

b prayin for haiti.. alot of people going through hard time because of earthquake. Jesus please be there hope an healer.... U r their first love. remind them of that even in trials, you are there~

treasure in his hands

So its monday!!! woot woot

Great.. feel'n really overwhelmed with all I need to do. ger... I think this state leaves me wanting to be stagnet. Not wanting to move because theres so much. but I think baby steps, are so important..

With this,  it also connects with so many things we dream about in life, or desire to do, or become. 

We get so excited about them, but when we see the journey, the challenge and  I think the pain. We tend just to forget the dream of the possible. To move forward, means letting go of the things either in the present or past. 

Gosh, I tend to carry way to many burdens, or have false hopes for people  that I wish would change. I pray for them, be there for them, but my hope i think isn't pleasing God.  yeah for others, but for my benefit-

I can't be responsible for others but  my self~ and only can do so much:)

Sounds strange right~ The hope obviously is probally from or on Gods heart, but for me to feel like I have to be the one to change or help that person is rediculous. I can't!

  

My life is to honor and follow after Jesus and his heart- and when people arn't willing to move forward, it leaves me at a place to sit with them and carry their burden, or to move forward and give them to God.

This is where i'm at, I'm desiring to let go of so much that has been burdening and holding me to stay ok with a unchanging, settling life.

Thats not who I am or who God is~

Incredible things God has for those who seek him, He is a God of stragedy and creativity for his Kingdom to come on earth!

Gosh its so hard to be the one to step out of the boat when others enjoys sitting in it~

( meaning from the bible when Jesus invited Peter to walk on water..)

I just now am learning so much, of my purpose in my life! ha and i thought i already knew~

So its really not about me or what I can do, but God and what he desires to through me~

To fully live for the Lord, is to fully abandon myself and life and place it in his hands. Because I am a treasure before him, something only he has, and can use in anyway:)

.....blah...i wish there was a reggae party in my town... random thought..haha need to dance this off~

So....why not give GOd everything? why not trust GOd with everything!

missionary in Africa working for children!

duhl~!

Bring it on GOd!

today is the day!

So it's late~ an it was a awesomely incredible day & night~
Why bc....... God did some super sweet things in the family i now live with- lives.... A couple missionaries came from Mozambique....... an shared on the, 'dream project' their working and starting there for children... Sweet stuff for sure.

Any how, despite that... We all were just rocked with praying for each other..
And my freind katie.. whom is amazing by the way.... Got some super cool 'words'! Oh, And for those out there who are lil out in the blue about the term words:)
They are a phrase Christians say when, God speaks to us, maybe personally or to one another..( a word, or encouragement)

Knowing Katie... she is prety much really good at alot of different things:)
And is intense focused when she enters something.. Welp to make a long story short..
She got a word about doing something new But even better... A ministry she can't do!!!!!!!

haha when i heard this i laughed real hard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She didn't think it was funny... But i got it.. Jesus was going to show himself to her in new way. He is behind her 100%. And through him, all things are possible!!
How awesome, i'm soooooooooo excited for her~What she can't do, God will. Wow God delights to be our handy man:)

BTW.... My new lil sis, sorta also got prayed for an it like super encouraged her.... i think one day she b missionary too~

Not to sure why i'm blogging this, but i believe that its cool How a missionary from brazil and mozambique comes to my lil town, my neighbor hood, an the house i just moved into- to encourage this christian family, who is so seeking God.....

I love it... i Love Gods heart for his beloved!
I love that he calls us faithful, an even when we don't see super cool things happen. My Daddy's always at work!
Just remembered i had coffee tonight.. perhaps thats why i'm still blogin, but really the chic on the mattress behind me thinks that I, should be blogin about what God showed me.. But its so much more fantastic, seeing How GOd continues to encourage the body of Christ in random ways:)

I love missionaries, i love that i am one, a good portion of the time, i love that GOd is not done with me yet! And most of all i love that GOd sees our potential and in his time, calls us into it, with his strength security and blessing. I'm so looking forward to this yr, not bc its 2 yrs closer to 2012( which really has no impact on my life:)..at least i don't believe). But mainly bc, he's doing new things all around the world!!!!!!!!
Praise Him, whom, desires to dwell among us, and use the open and obediant:) WHo uses the foolish things of the world to confound the wise!

Who speaks through donkeys, and call us to be more like children, believing in him.

Tell u the truth, my life is so random sometimes, But Gosh the Lord never fails to show his faithfulness to me..
Random-
Today i wanted to know Gods love a bit more.... My freind was randomly telling me how her husband is so trustworthy, an just adores her!! that she never has to question him on maybe why he is late, or what he's doing, or.... But She just knows He loves her and is faithful... Its like she's so secure ~
~ I felt like God was using this story to speak to me.
I know Before GOd has told me how He is the faithful one, and will always be to me... But it was neat to be reminded of How i'm to trust God, Like my friend trusts her husband...
her husband would never do anything to harm her, but help her, an care for her:)


Thats the same with GOd, His love is to care, love and be our security!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I know this isn't to profound, but Gods love.. is so great! I'm so challenged today to trust in his love an care~
Maybe it is profound, for me it is at this moment.. I wish their was a God cheer swad... man i'de be so good at it!
Aight.. night time..
oh the words for me in a bundle= fire, globe, children, missions, joy, bible, freedom in worship!

OH LASTLY~~~~~~~~~~~~I climbed a huge mountain today on snowshoes, w Katie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol-at least pertended so.. actually was White RD hill!:) It so so pretty out, sparkling snow, bright sunshine...below zero.. but we were bundled up! And the huskies were out too~

2010

chapter 2010

oh man, includes me just moving out of my apartment an into a new place:)

I love that God has seasons in different places for me, an provides for me in awesome ways..

Above all else; this year i desire to see the challenges ahead of me turn into the promises of God~

I know this year God will be increasing much in my walk with Him as i seek him, i know this year a harvest is more then ready, and by going into it many fruit will b waiting~!
I know this year, He desires to continue to be the potter in my life, and shape me into something from his heart.
I know this year he wants me to see not through my own eyes, but to look closely through his:)

In all ways an whatever directions i take this year; i believe its something fabulous He is doing all around the world!
There has never been a time in all history that the gospel is an will be shared in every nation~! And where people are reaching out to those who have been over looked.
There will be many challenges up ahead this year, but it will be hugely fruitful to Gods kingdom:)
Prasie God... that He looks in the heart of man an see's the possible then, goes ahead an calls him/her to it! For his glory~

2010!!!! lets rock:) For the Lord!

whom shall i fear?

So it seems as if everything i look or hear about latley are talking bout the heart.

I think its really important to live from it, i'm definately tired right now but to plainly state whats on my elbow is;

Why is it easy to live from the mind, and the state of doing, instead of listening to your heart.

Sure the heart can be decieving but when i say listen to your heart its more then just on directions in what to do or not.

But the roots to why you choose what you do or not..

Gosh i feel like i'm going in a circle~

To loose grasp of your heart can lead u to be a walking iron rod, running into what ever and doing what ever, despite the fact that the people you walk over or run into have importance and may even be the answer to questions you would have never known, or found a certain opinon on.
Hm
I was reading a book on called waking the dead, by John eldridge, its great but a wake up call to the faint at heart.
It's challenging me move towards what the Lord has put in my heart, an my purpose to live from it~

I get so mad sometiems when i become numb to my own heart~
I guess i definately am not one of those walking rods, but some times when i'm having a hard time with someone or something, i numb my heart perhaps pushing it away will make it all better right, but really makes it in a bigger mess. As conflict can either be a door of growth or a downward tunnel of pain.

I remember the famous tin man on wizard of oz, all he wanted was a heart:)
He just wanted to feel- Yet bc of the wicked witch she made his life misserable an didn't want him to be happy~
I think this reminds me of Satan, and his plans for pretty much everyone, he either wants your life to suck as you try to live for Christ, or he wants you to be pretty happy while you spiritually die in the state of there is no God. how much more happier could Satan be right..

I guess what i'm tryin to say is, if life isn't going to be all rosy, we need to have a heart that is willing to put up a fight for at least the rain to create more roses:)
if that makes sence...

To be brave at heart.. means surrendering to a great cause, other then your self. To live an love for the hope of a Jesus to do miricles in places in which seems so dark an impossible.
To be brave at heart to me means living a life of considering yours, Gods and other hearts~ and living to walk beside them in partnership to be the move of the greater good:)

I know Gods heart is by far the bravest< i can only just believe He would use my faint heart to become more like his=brave

gotta love dreams baba!

I had a dream a few nights ago. It was the most beautiful dream i ever experianced... I just thought ide share the beauty, depsite what happen in the dream!

I was drining in a car, by a ocean... while in the ocean were huge sparkeling flowing water falls in the back ground!
While dolphins jumping all around:)
Driving more i saw the most beautiful sunset i could even imagine- was like reds, violets, orange yellows, with the perfect surroundings:)
It was awesome!~ There was totaly peace.......... The person in the car with me, is someone, i have a hard time with alot and I felt like Jesus was showing me the promise of peace. Whether its hard now... in the future there wil be total peace. Where we can experiance God love an peace together, depsite the things on earth that try to tear each other apart;)
Or perhaps, maybe its possible now to have this great peace...?